ADD, IS disordered, language delays, dyslexia, sleep disorders, tactile disfuction, vestibular disfuctions, OT, PT, speech therapy.................

MY HEAD HURTS!!!!!!!!!!

Before I start this post I will say I'm not out to offend anyone, if you're offended I apologize, I don't know much about this stuff, and extreamly confused, and not an expert. This is just my own conclusions I'm starting to come to, and I need to write it all down to sort it out in my mind. However I will very much accept any constructive critisim, and discussion.

A little background. #1 has always been an odd and fairly difficult child. I assumed it was mainly due to his personality, and his known language delays and would improve with school and working with a speech therapist. I also felt he may have some issues dyslexia in the future since his cousin's do, and he has many of the same personality traits as them.

So last week I had a DUH moment. I've been walking around saying I suspect my child will have learning disability's when it dawns on me, DUH he DOES. His language issues are classified as a learning disability which is why he's in the public school system for preschool, and already has an IEP. This realization set me in to mass reading mode, I've made several trips to the library and have read 4 or 5 books on various learning disabilities, oddly enough I still have to find one on Language. I realized that my saying I have to read up on learning disabilities someday, had come and gone. Unfortunately most of them have basically said get ready for the next 12 years of your life and you're child's life to be hell, and a constant battle. I'm now seriously preparing to homeschool if I find it necessary in the future. I refuse to accept this and force my child to learn to hate learning.

The confusion comes because everything has the same dang symptoms and overlaps, so you never really get a clear answer as to what something is. So here's what I think it all means.

ADD/ADHD. I read a book called the ADD solution by Frank Lawles. What I took from the book is a label that for the most part describes a list of behaviors, mainly an inability to focus attention when needed and easy distractability. Many times it has a root cause or causes other then a brain disfunction, such as parenting, sleep patterns, or emotional problems ( I know there were more in the book, just can't think what they were right now) . There are many ways of dealing with the symptoms other then medication, some of which I've had a small amount of experience with growing up with a "crunchy" aunt who rubbed off on my mom. Some of the ones I found most interesting include exercise, biofeedback(relaxation techniques that are medically measured), changes in parenting styles, behavior modification therapy, proper nutrition, and allergies. After reading 2 of the books there would have to be some MAJOR contradicting research to ever make me put my child on an ADHD medication. It seems to me they can cause more problems, including depression, then they solve. Not to mention most are either methanphetamines or a close cousin to methanphetamines, and they will usually stop working as the child becomes a teenager (anyone want to guess why Ex is such a problem in our country??????). I really don't think #1 is ADD, but think it's only time if we don't figure something else before a teacher wants to label him as this. We are working on some of the relaxation techniques in the book.

Sensory Integration Disorders. Basically anything is off kilter with you're kid and they'll fit into the symptoms of this, but may not have it. Like easily distracted (sounds like ADD to me), craving touch, not liking touch, craving some, but disliking others, being a daredevil, being a scared child etc, etc, etc. There are 3 basic area's and #1 shows a lot of the symptoms for 2 of them. Many he would have a year ago but has outgrown recently. The therapy for this is occupational Therapy, most of the things the book (The Out of synch Child) said to do with #1 are things he does already, and activities he has at school. This can be closely related to Language (not speech) disorders. It also says it's perfectly in line for a child to act one way at school or home and be the complete opposite the other place, and #1's teacher thinks he's a joy to have in class, and an angle so we know that's #1.

Speaking of Speech and Language problems. Speech is the way a child says words, Language is understanding (not hearing) correctly and replying correctly when communicating. We know #1 has a Language problem, but not speech. I don't know why, or how come. After reading a few generic L.D. books I came across Auditory Processing Disorder, Hm. Sounds like it could cause Language problems but the book didn't say this.....Coud he have that as a problem? If so there's been a lot of promise shown with various computer games.

Dyslexia. My oldest nephew is dyslexic, and has gone through a program come up with by a guy who was diagnosed as both Austistic and dyslexic as a child and thought himself how to learn. My nephew had huge success with it. His reading level jumped 2 grades, and his report cards have gone from C's, and D's with a few F's to B's and C's with a few A's. I read the book by this guy Davis a few years ago it's "The Gift of Dyslexia". He also has a preschool home kit I will get from my other sister who's son is showing early signs (they can't test till 2nd grade), or order it this summer. Basically what he says is that people with dyslexia have a "third eye" that is not in a fixed position and can move, go around corners, letters in the book etc. His method is learning how to make it stay put. He also talks about things like seeing an energy dial, which my nephew does, and he can dial it up or down depending on the situation. Before learning to move his dial it would make concentration hard (Sounds like add again) if it was up at school, or sports difficult if it was down while on the hockey rink. After reading the Sensory book, I see a lot of that stuff in my nephew, like not being able to eat food with different textures

So, I think I have a plan. I have #1's IEP meeting in a couple weeks. I need to go get a book on Language disabilities so I can have half a clue of what I'm talking about on the one issue I know he has. I will also need to re-read parts of the SI book and take notes on what I'm comparing #1 too. At the meeting I need to bring this up and ask for an O.T. evaluation to see if it's on the radar screen. I was told that if they won't do it I shouldn't sign the paper work. I will not mention or muddy the waters with ADD since I don't' think it's the problem and I don't want to put it in their heads, or the dyslexia since hopefully working with him this summer will prevent any future reading difficulties, which is the basic definition of dyslexia. And I need to ask them about his writing. They've sent home paper for him to practice on with a note which makes me think they don't think we do practice his name almost every day, and if he's not improving on that,

that may be an issue to address as well, or add to my thought of SI disorder.

Things I need to do, but not bring up at the meeting are work with #1 on relaxation techniques and make sure he's getting plenty of exercise. I already signed him up for sports this summer. I also need to talk to my sister and see if I will need to buy the kit and if so order it.

Who would you sleep with?

Yesterday hubby found out his co-worker's wife left him for his best friend. This got me thinking, and last night I fell asleep with thoughts of who would I sleep with if I were suddenly single, which led to a very strange dream about dating Orlando Bloom, but that's another story. However for clarification I dumped him because he wasn't a good enough boyfriend (nah I don't have any narcisitic tendicys ;-)).

I was telling hubby about my this and we started talking about who we would sleep with if the other one died....Real people we know not celebrities...And no I won't name names, Sorry.

After setting ground rules of if it was the right circumstances and the other person was suddenly single too, I came up with 2 people. One would be no more then a one night stand, and the other I could see as a relationship. This doesn't include Felipe, who I met on my trip down to Blog Blowout, and again at the b ar, but I'd never find him again, and he is more in the fantasy realm then the reality one. If it did, then my total would be 2 one night stands and 1 LTR.

Hubby who isn't much of a people person, and knows far fewer people then I do, came up with 4 total...2 one nighter's and 2 possible LTR's. MEN!!! I did approve of one of his LTR possibilities as a future step-mom for my kids if I ever die though ;-) The other, I would only approve if my boys were grown and raised and gone from the house.

I must say it was a very interesting, and very enlightening conversation to have.

Is it the aliens?

Have they taken up residence in my 5 yr old again? Someone? Anyone with the answer?

You may remember a few months ago #1 decided he didn't want to go to school, and refused to get on the bus, so I took him not having a clue of what was going on, and he refused to go to his class, but then was upset about missing school. We came home had a nice long nap, a day of no tv, and cleaning. That seemed to be the end of it. Until today.

He took 2 steps out of the house, turned around and ran back in. WTF???? Even under threat of no tv, no computer/video games, and taking his favorite toy away, he wouldn't go, but was mad when the bus left him. I can't get a clear answer out of him to save my life as to "why" he won't go, and when I talk about him not being able to see his teacher/friends now he's upset. I don't get it.

So here we go again. He's in his room for at least an hour "napping". I confiscated all toys out of it, and later we will clean it. I get to figure out how to keep him busy today without tv, but not let him have too much fun. I do have to say I think his temper, lack of using his words, and language issues have been worse lately, but I for the most part, have put it off to spring fever.

I think I'm glad I work tonight, even though I had been dreading it.

Updates

On the personal ad I have so far gotten 1 response, and she is suppose to call me when she knows when she can do something.

As far as the snake, I blew up the picture so here!

And just for good measure the other picture I took:

I know I'm loosing it, but my mind isn't gone so far yet that I'm halucinating snakes in my yard. And no I have no idea why they came out in black and white in blogger...they aren't in the file, but I'm not going to worry about that right now.

My personal ad

After an eye opening mom's club Easter party, where I've decided I think most of them are snobs, I decided to follow TKW's lead (I used you're gypsie line too) and created a personal ad that I posted on Craiglist.

I don't sound too weird or hippieish in it do I?

Mommy looking for mommy (or non-mommy female) friends

YOU:
You don’t smoke around you’re kids, don’t yell across a mall at you’re kids that you will “beat your bottoms when we get home, and are no longer into the bar scene, but like an occasional margarita. You can leave your children for an occasional night out and not need to be home by bedtime. You are accepting of other people and their views/parenting styles, and not go ewww at the thought of someone nursing their baby’s past a year, much less 6 months. Or at least know enough to not say it. And you understand my urge to sell my children to the gypsies occasionally and understand I do really love them, and I’m kidding…. mostly.

ME
Happily married, mostly SAHM to 2 boys 5 and 2. Playmates for them are good, but I’m mostly looking for me friends. I live in a funky 40yr old house in Florence with horrible decorating, and love it. I’m trying to correct one room at a time. I cannot see myself ever living in a new development, but don’t care if you do, as I see the advantages. I tend to think of myself as a moderate in most politcal realms. Mostly libral with a few issues I’m feirously conservative on. I love to discuss most ideologies/theologies, but not all. After all I married a conservative, and am happy not talking politics as well, or I’d be divorced.

I like shopping, but being a cheapskate at heart prefers garage sales and thrift stores to malls. I like most music except classical, rap, heavy metal, and The Wiggles. I like camping, hiking, reading, hanging out in a coffee shop, game nights, eating at a restraunt when I can taking my time without cutting up anyone’s food.

Most of all we moved here almost 2 years ago and I need grown-ups to talk to! Couple friends would be good too, but hubby is a slightly shy self-admitted computer geek, and not into sports, cars, most “normal” guy things, but that’s what I love about him.

Let's hope this works...I'll let you all know, I know you're dying to hear updates in my oh so exciting social life.

I've been fired!!!!

#1 looked at me today when he was upset with me and calmly said " Mommy, you're fired". To which I responded COOL! Watch you're brother, I'm off to get a pedicure. Too bad he didn't get the context of my relpy. Oh well And no we don't watch the apprentice, but I think someone in his class does.

The neighbors

Ok, in my snake post I eluded to an issue with my neighbors. This may not be an issue anymore, since I or my kids may never go outside again, but I'm sure the first round of whining on a nice day will make me brave snakes.

Here's the deal. I kind of do daycare for my neighbors 3 days a week. I say kind of because I've never had them more then 2 days a week and maybe 10 times total since around Christmas when I started this. He works outside with a friend and they weren't working because of weather, or taxes, or who knows. Personally I don't care right now. Nice money when he does, free time when he doesn't. However I think his wife cares a little more, but not my problem.

The problem is that every time we're outside the kids want to play together. Normally I don't mind this, but there are times it's an issue. I let my boys out in the back yard alone. I constantly check on them, and tie the gate shut with a rope. The kids will come over to play then, and I'm not comfortable with them being out there without an adult. a) because I don't want #2 wandering off (#1 knows better) and b)They're little girl is only 1 and needs to be watched closer on our swingset. Usually the dad is out in his yard, but he doesn't keep as close an eye on his kids as I do mine, or his. Or I'll be out doing things and my kids will want to go to their yard. If their mom's there I feel like I'm dumping my kids on her, if the dad is, I still feel like I need to be keeping an eye on them, because of fights and their yard isn't totally fenced and opens to our driveway..

Their boy is really good when I have him, but can be a brat when his folks are around, as well as can my child. Because of this they seem to fight alot more then they ever have when I've been watching them, but I think I've solved this with telling my kids if they can't play nice they can't play with them, and telling them they'll have to go home if they can't play nice.

Also like last night, they were BBQing and my kids decided to go play...well the parent's said it's ok, but what were they going to say, you know? I had to run out so I told my Dh under no circumstances were they to stay over there after their company came.

Ok, so now that I wrote this out it really sounds like I'm just overreacting, and I probably am.

HOLY SNAKES!!!!

Today as I was hanging laundry watching my kids play I was thinking, "yes I really could enjoy living in the country." In large part because of some issues I've had with a neighbor have made me realize I really like my privacy, and solitude (I'll post the neighbor thing later). But then came something that made me feel very diffrently.

I finished hanging laundry and went to tell my boys I was running inside, and would be back in minute when I saw it. It being THIS















After catching the scream that was on it's way in my throat, I calmly called #1 over to give him a real life lesson. I showed him the little "baby" snake and proceeded to explain why if we ever see one we need to stay away from it. If we scare it, it might bite us. Not to mention it scared the SHIT out of his mother.

My logic also set in that it is highly unlikely this is a poisonous kind, but to be on the safe side I grabbed #2, told #1 to stay in the swingset while I grabbed the camera. By this time he was in the dog run, but I don't know if any of his family is still slithering around our yard. I took some pictures, made sure he left our yard, and now I get to look up snakes and try to identify the type while my boys sleep today.

As a side note, I lived in TX for 2 years and the only snake I saw in my yard was dead and half eaten by my dog. Gross yes, scary no. WTF????

Dear door to door evangelist,

I have a word of advice for you. When you walk up to a house that has toys outside, a half dug up rock garden, It's quite and you look in the window and see a woman dozing on the couch with toys scattered everywhere DO NOT RING THE DOOR BELL! She will not be very happy or receptive to your "saving" message if you wake her up, get the dog barking, and probably wake up her children from their nap, after she's been digging up a damn rock garden all morning and collapsed on the couch in front of tv and fell asleep.

In fact you're lucky, I was nice, I simply told you I have a church (Ok, not at the moment, but it sure as HELL will not be yours), and you just got the dog barking and probably woke up my children so I don't have time for this, before I slammed the door in your face.

If I'd been awake enough I'd have told you that not only have my IL's tried to "save" me in their religion. I have a few acquaintances from your church who have tried to "save" me, and my mother continually try's to "save" me by telling me I need to ignore the politics of her church, and just go. So far none of them have succeeded, what makes you think, you have a snowballs chance in hell, where I'm sure you're sure I'm going. Then I could have continued on my list of why you're particular religion would never be one I would choose for myself. Not to mention you're tactics have the adverse effect of you're actual goal on me. Maybe I'd listen to you if you picked up the shovel you walked by and got all the rocks out of the garden....Maybe, not likely, but maybe.

Thank you for your time.
One pissed off, tired, and sick housewife.

Ow, ow, and ow

Can I say I regret my wanting "character" in a house over a "normal" house a million times a week? No I still love my house, just when I do things like try to fix it up I pay for it the next day. Or when I fall down my kookie 4 steps from the living room to the kitchen...Although I haven't done that for at least a month...Maybe I've learned, Hmmm?

Yesterday I took the peonies out of my front planter, and placed them around the back yard. Why you ask? (if you heard this last year, just skip it) . Even though the teenybopper at the nursery laughed at me, My father always told me peonies need ants to bloom. Last year we had a nasty ant invasion in our familyroom....Connected to the front planter. I also had plants that didn't bloom. It took me all summer to realize that those plants were peonies and my assault on the ants and non-blooming plants were probably connected. So this year the lovely peonies were picked up and moved to various areas well away from the house. I still need something to put out front. There are other purple flowers in the box that bloom in late spring, but it looks a little empty. I'm thinking some of those cheap flowers from the grocery store you have to plant every year. I was thinking lily's, but I want something that will be there all summer.

After finishing that project I set to working on fixing our rock garden. We have an area of rocks with some defunct sidewalk lighting in it. Unfortunately the lighting needs fixing and/or replacing, and the anti weed plastic sheeting no longer works. I don't want to spray them because my kids love playing with the rocks. Yesterday I shoveled out less then 1/4 of the rocks, It's going to be a long project.

Ohh, but while I'm on the gardening kick....My catnip seeds are starting to sprout. Hopefully that means the other herbs and veggies I started indoors will too!

The conclusion of "The Great Florence Mystery"

After hours of digging and sweating, Toiling, and blood, and a few tears (Ok that's because I stabbed myself with a seam ripper working on some curtains), the great mystery was reveled. Part way into the dig it was discovered that the"wood" was actually metal and there was another piece of wood next to it, Could this be an old root cellar filled with all sorts of hideous, pickled vegetables?

So what was under the large piece of metal sheeting you ask?



NOTHING, well unless you count a few worm and or snake trails. Sorry hubby, maybe next time you'll find you're stashed money.

The Great Florence Mystery Part I

It all started this morning when Hubby and I decided that it was time to put a dog run into our yard. Our wonderful 4 legged companion has decided that in addition to marking the entire yard as "his" territory, he needs to use the prime areas, near the swingset, under my clothesline, etc, as his own personal rest room.

As I am trying to put in the last post I keep hitting something hard about a foot down. Hmm doesn't sound like a tree root, or a rock. It almost has a hollow sound. Being the lazy ass I am, I called Hubby over to figure it out. After all, he has all those years of practice putting up fencing on the farm he grew up on.

A few minutes later hubby calls me over, what is it you ask? A wooden box, looks like it had been painted white. Hubby thinks we've hit our fortune in hidden money, or an old time capsule with valuable toys and comics. Me? I say it's either a) a cistern or well covering b) someone's pet's grave, or c) a body. Yes I have watched WAY to many crime shows ;-) Guess we'll have to wait for Hubby to completely unearth it to see.

















Stay tuned for the exciting conclusion of, "The Great Florence Mystery".